A weird week.

Didn't do much.

Class on Wednesday got canceled cause my psyc teacher always takes a day off after holidays.

Felt hollow from doing nothing really extraordinary.

Spent some money that I shouldn't spend on a new sweater and a belt.

Saw the summer plane tickets went up 60 bucks with a rate of $30 per week.

Sold all my old shoes to a thrift store in San Jose and got a few bucks back.

Saw the Yankee's took the first place in the American League East but the RedSox's are still close behind out tail.

Drank 3 liters of Dr. Pepper in one day.

Ran out of money to buy my pre pay development envelop for my film.

Stopped taking photos just to save some film for my Utah/Texas trip.

Got my broken Swatch replaced with a brand new one with no cost right away.

Had a nasty bad hair day and a good one too.

Played some PC games till 5 am in the morning.

Lost my phone charger some where in San Diego.(Eventually found it under my butt in the couch)

Spent 2 hours reading 3 editions of Time after missing it for 2 weeks.

Talked to a long-time-no-talk good friend on Facebook(Still better than nothing..:P), felt great. Can't wait to go visit her family in Texas.

I think thats basically the deal for this weird felling short week.



Good luck on the finals for the people that are still in hawaii.

it was never there

pretend you're okay.

pretend you're still happy

pretend you don't care about that bull crap


I wish I can leave the house right now.

but I can't. I don't have the ability and the guts.


I wish I can be a cold blood animal. But I'm born with a heart that pumps hot warm blood at 97˚F.


no need to tell them
just keep it all to yourself





I wish I can cry the whole night. but it only lasted for like 10 minutes.

At least I did cry.



they don't know what is going on.


Seems that I just have to fulfill my dream by myself.



Get the $ and run to hawaii.

Possibilities

Okay. I admit I'm unpredictable, unstable, inconsistent in doing all these planning.

But just to tell you now.

Going back to Hawaii will not be a dream anymore.


Just like people deciding to get married only for married for couple months, I'm making my decision in one night that I'm heading back to hawaii for sure.



For all the wonderful friends I love, for the beautiful beach I miss, for the lovely sun that tans me well.

Me, tingler, will see you in hawaii.



I'm also going to start a small photography business. Helping out all those wonderful couples getting married with an affordable cost and quality service. Any ideas how I should name my business?

Memorial Weekend.

film for the weekend.



Hope it comes out good.

achievement?

I forgot how long did I have my flickr account.

A few years?

I admit the photo number is quite massive

Can you blame me? ha


Get a flickr account. And go look for me




Btw I'm in Murrieta, CA now in Alex's uncles home.
Visiting for the weekend and memorial day.

Went to the near by hills took some great pictures with my film.

Kinnda did a little experiment with different film, just gotta wait till I develop them to see the results.

Stupidly opened the camera film hatch before rewinding the film inside,I was on frame#3, I think it killed a few frames on the roll. very bad move.I call myself an idiot just for that!

Tomorrow is church day. Oh dear, they go to a spanish speaking church.
Thats really gonna kill me.
But still thank god it's not 7 in the morning.

ha

Take me to the ball game.

So here I am, in South Cali.

Just got back from a LA Angles @ LA Dodgers game

My first ball game in the states.


Amazing. Totally different from what you see on the TV or the internet.

It's addictive.



Sang my first "Take me to the ball game"(Went off tone.)

Caught my first homerun ball. (I wish! too bad it didn't really happen)


Too bad the Dodgers lost. 1-3


Whats next?



oh by the way this is my 100th post. finally.

the day dream

sometimes it a scene
or it's just a single tone or melody
that gives you a chill to the bone

not an unpleasant feel. but more like a frequency synchronization
your body tells you it heard that before.
it felt that before, maybe just your conscious mind depressed it.

The melody, struck in your mind, struck hard.
it's emotional, but no tears.
just you sitting there, your feelings pulled out from the reality
trying to recognize the time and space in a different dimension
like when you're lying there with the one you love in sleep, it quite, it's peaceful.


just when the reality hits, you're on the street by yourself, lonely.
but the feeling still lingers in your mind. Like an echo.
and you walk forwards.

film scans

the room



Fujichrome Velvia50 / EOS3 EF501.4USM




the home made cake



Fujichrome Velvia50 / EOS3 EF501.4USM

Problematic of Opposite Sex Friendships

So here's an issue.


How do you recognize and separate friendship and sexual attraction from each other?

Is that friend love, or loving a girl love?

In a situation you have a lot opposite sex good friends, you're still dang single, thats gonna be an big issue(unless you're gay.)
You love all your friends. Amazing Girls. But you also feel lonely from all the years from being single.
Dating your friends, I don't know, it's just weird.
And sometimes the attempt of relationship might even ruin the friendship itself.


All I can think of is to be passive about things.
Friendship first priority, a least thats what I'm doing now. (I'm never getting married, am I?)


Dang I need to date people.

Why never people come and ask me out for a date?



Any other suggestions?

Broke again

I went bankrupt again.

(Which is something I haven't done in a while)


This time for the ticket to go down to San Diego to visit Alex during Memorial 3 Day weekend.


It took me a while to make this big decision. to go broke again.
I mean, what else can I do rather than traveling during this awful long summer?
So travel it is.

May 22nd Friday, Jet blue $129

May 26th Tuesday, Southwest Airlines $59

I'll make it total as $200


I wish both the tickets were $59.....




Oh, yeah I forgot to mention this, I also spent another 100 bucks on film again.
Cause I used all my remaining ISO/ASA 100 color reversal film during Chelsea's visit, like two rolls of them?
Since I'm low on film already, so spending that money basically is inevitable for me.

(I hate using my EOS40D these days....)

3 rolls of Fujichrome Velvia100
3 rolls of Fujichrome Provia100F
3 rolls of Fujichrome Astia100F
and a Canon EW-83 II LENS HOOD for EF20-35mm f/3.5-4.5 USM

plus 2 day shipping(so that I will get it before going down to San Diego...)


So I'm so broke now. till June.

aftermath

it feels weird now
after chelsea came, and she left.
it feels like you had something very meaningful to you returned to you.
but just for a day.
and it's gone again


just like the ending of the movie Artificial Intelligent.

The robot boy get to be with her mother, but just for one day.



and like there is so much I wanna to say, so much wanna do
but didn't got the chance



alone again.

miss you all.

Travel Plans for June27-July03

So this is the summery of my first batch of travel late June to mid July

June, 27
United Airlines:
San Jose, CA- Salt Lake City, UT

"Visit Matt Willie"

July, 2
"Attend Christian Evans & Kaytie Jean Favero's wedding @ Ogden, UT"


July, 3
United Airlines:
Salt lake City, UT- San Antonio, TX
Greyhound: San Antonio, TX- Del Rio, TX


"Visit April Powell, Brooke Powell"


July 15
Greyhound: Del Rio, TX- San Antonio, TX
Southwest Airlines:
San Antonio, TX- San Jose, CA


Estimate transportation fee: $480

Crazy beginning for the summer of 2009

Life is too dramatic these days.

started from Sunday.

-Had a crazy party Saturday at UC-Davis, drove back home at 5am on mothers day morning. (Got lost on the way back, almost headed to SanFrancisco)


-Chelsea called me Sunday night telling me that she is coming to cali visiting this week! (I was originally going to alaska to vist her instead.)


-A student riding a bike crashed into my car in the parking lot at school today. Scary. My poor car.


-Katie's getting married soon, in Canada. Nathan's the lucky boy. Congrats! (Who's next?)



Seems like the supreme being above us in the sky is having a fun chess game with our lives.

He sure does have some sense of humor.

And I'm enjoying it.

I'm selling my lens- SOLD

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=150343979296

Canon EF-s 10-22mm f/3.5-5.6 USM

Super wide angle zoom lens for Canon EOS Rebel's, EOS 20D 30D 40D 50D, APS-C size sensor cameras.

Mint condition.(I mean VERY good) Under warranty.

ESRP $750

I'm selling it for $535 on ebay.



If any of you guys want it. As a friend I can give you a friendship discount.(for example like $25 off?)

please tell your friends, and friends of your friends!

Free to contact me if you got any questions.

there has never been a deal out there for me

so here I am, May Day's

(not the distress signal...)





5 months has passed, still nothing for me to do around the place.
Not a singe interview, negative income, one big travel(Guatemala),
too much time, too less to do(and no income to support big projects).



Although it sounds nasty boring
there is still some things going on these days

I've been trying to put together my portfolio for a long while, but never finished.
Cause of the photo class recently, it gave me a chance to go over the photographs I took before.
So one by one each time, the portfolio selection is building up.


Mail is one thing I do too.
For example of all the postcards I sent everyone recently.
I just got some more 28cent postage stamps for postcards, so I'm gonna do more of it.


Birthday presents.
Like Erika dear's 20th anniversary's coming soon next week.
It was a great process doing her birthday present.
I have to say thats the first time I spent that much of an effort on a birthday present itself.
Haha lucky Erika.

But don't get me wrong, thats doesn't mean I love erika more than you guys as a friend. She was just lucky.


Oh, and I'm also thinking of selling one of my lens too.
Hard decision though.



BTW the AT&T internet service broke down with no reason last night.
So now I'm living on a public shared Google Wifi provided in Mountain View(Where Google's headquarters are based)

Cruel. Really cruel.

Wish when the tech person from the service department comes tomorrow can save my miserable life from lack of good quality internet service.

This is not what it supposed to be like....

Dang.



Weekends here are killing me.



Nothing really worth doing around these places.


Not much friends around.


Not much money to even do things.


I feel like all the spare time I got now is wasted on nothing.

I wanna go travel.(But I'm stuck here in cali)



I wanna go to utah.
I wanna go to texas.
I wanna go to nyc.
I wanna go to iowa.
I wanna go to idaho.
I wanna go to alaska.

And I miss hawaii.